Nothing says “Perfect Halloween” like making costumes, eating too much candy, and throwing a temper tantrum.

Darin and Oscar had a good time, too.

We went as the main voting demographic of the current election:

That’s right, mindless, flesh-eating undead monsters.

Who eat babies…

Oscar enjoyed another long-held tradition of politics, going door-to-door and taking food out of people’s mouths.

Look at how he panders to the cameras.

Overall, we had a wonderful time, and taught Oscar a lot about family values.

The most important value in this family being, Mama gets all the candy.

I love that having kids is like experiencing a second childhood. For years we never celebrated Halloween except to hoard cheap candy to tide us over until Christmas.

Now we can experience the joy of dressing up, carving pumpkins, and having an excuse to watch “It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown.”

Finally, in a few days we can all experience the joy of the fact that in less than 48 hours we will no longer have to watch political commercials, pulls ugly fliers our of our mail, or deal with robot phone calls. I’d rather get Zombie phone calls any day.

Zombies don’t talk, but they sure are cute.

I had high hopes for this Halloween, Oscar’s first. Having a baby has renewed my sense of excitement about the holidays; normally I am something of a scrooge. This Halloween I imagined finding the perfect costume for Oscar, getting a professional portrait done, carving a pumpkin, baking cookies, and drinking hot cider. Ha! Old habits die hard, and as usual, I waited until the last minute. Who knew that grocery stores actually run out of pumpkins?

I was disappointed in the selection of costumes for children. I imagined something like comfy pajamas with cute ears and tails. Instead, I found an array of cheap plastic crap. Most of costumes (even the ones labeled for 6-12 month infants) looked huge and ill-fitting. Even if they were the right size, I don’t think I would put that garbage on my son. I may change my mind when he’s five and begging to be Captain Jack Sparrow, but right now I have slightly higher standards. Unfortunately, high standards require time, and I ran out of that.

I finally decided to make his costume, but since I have neither a sewing machine nor sewing skills, this required some quick thinking and a little imagination. I finally had a eureka moment when I was standing in the middle of Target looking at miniature black sweat pants. A kitty! Black sweats, ears, whiskers. How hard could it be? So I bought the sweats and went to Michael’s for some black felt and black cardboard. Using an old headband, black and white felt, cardboard, and a stapler, I made his ears. Then Darin drew on his nose and whiskers using an eyeliner pencil.

Doesn’t Oscar make a cute kitty?

Finally, I dressed myself in black and made a hat using cardboard and tape. I added a broom I found at the Dollar Store and…

A witch and her familiar!

Oscar managed to stay in his costume for about half an hour, to the delight of our handful of trick-or-treaters. Then I put him to bed, put my feet up, and ate a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup.

It wasn’t quite the perfect Halloween I imagined, but there’s always next year!